“You can’t come here every week!” I said in my most politely agitated voice. The look on the face of the two service people told me they didn’t hear my effort at polite. I tried to sympathize. But seriously? How often did a meter need to be read?

Thinking to myself that everything with the word smart in it was probably smart in favor of someone other than me, I had elected to forego the free and convenient smart meter that would tell the electric company what they needed to know in favor of one that wasn’t smart (according to them). They, of course, needed to install it inside my house. And not being terribly fond of strangers knocking at my door at 7:30 in the morning while I was still in my pajamas trying to enjoy my first cup of coffee, I found their visits less than welcome; and they found them less than welcoming. At least we had something in common. This was the third visit in five weeks, and I was beginning to wonder if Remer Electric had a secret ground game to irritate its uncooperative customers into compliance with their preferences. They were clearly unaware of my ground game of living life on my own terms. Some people might call that crabby. I call it the why am I paying for something that Tesla said should be free in the first place POV. I doubted the meter reader had read anything about Nikola Tesla, but who was I to judge? Everyone knows public utilities are for everyone’s well-being.

After they left I went down to my basement to move back into place the few boxes that had been in the way of them reading the meter. A high pitch followed by a couple of chirpy beeps caught my attention and I stopped long enough to try to determine where it was coming from. The meter? I don’t know much about electric meters, but I’ve lived long enough to know it was unusual for them to make that sort of sound. A quiet hum maybe, but a high-pitched whine? I pulled the boxes away again and examined it. I wasn’t altogether convinced it was the meter. But it was something – what? Attached? Behind?

The problem was going to need another cup of coffee, I reasoned, and I jogged upstairs to fill my cup and get dressed. If I had only known what was ahead, I might’ve done something  more calming, like watching a Star Trek marathon.

to be continued . . .

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